Sunday, May 6, 2012

Isu Kahwin Muda

A fellow blogger, author of Mindbuggling made an entry of this subject. I was writing my comments down when I realized that it is far too long to be a comment so I decided to make an entry out of it. Haha

Well this is a tough subject. To be dealt in the religious perspective, rational perspective and personal perspective. I am not very qualified to say much in the religious point of view so please be easy on me. I've talked to my Umi about this subject as one of my friend (my age) got engaged and broke the engagement recently. Another acquaintance of mine (same age again) got married and seems to be doing just fine. It is true that it can prevent maksiat, however, how rational these youngsters are? Are they fit to get married? I don't mean physically. I mean mentally and emotionally. Are they able to cope with the responsibility? The commitment? The stress? (Oh admit it, living with someone else would ensue stress, one way or another at one point.)

We're talking about marriage here. This is a whole new different level, unlike having a boyfriend or a girlfriend or a fiancee. Marriage is a sacred institution. You are taking care of someone's child (for the guys), and the girls, you are trusting a man to take care of you for (probably) the rest of your life. It is very irritating how people can take this subject very lightly. 'Alah if anything goes wrong, cerai aje!'. Wow, that easy huh? It's not fun and game you know, it's a commitment, it's a blessed knot between a man and a woman. If you react that way, then I do not think that you are fit to get married now. I see I am a little astray from the main topic. But you see, a person have to be ready for the responsibility and the commitment. And if one is too young or not ready mentally, I am not sure if it is the best idea for them. Therefore it depends on the individual.

On a more personal level, hang tak ada income lagi, hang tak boleh bayar bil sendiri lagi, hang bergantung dekat mak apak lagi, dah gatai sangat nak kahwin? No offence for the young married couples but this is what I feel. For me, I want to at least pay half of my wedding expenses, have my own steady income, can feed myself, can pay my own bills (if not my parents too) and can help my parents financially. And those are only the most minimum expectation of myself. Even then, I want to make sure that I am ready mentally to tie the knot. As they say, only fools rush into things. Someone said them but I can't bother to look up names nor remembering them now (or the exact wording).

What I wanna say is, it is truly a happy occasion, to be married with someone you love, but you must be ready for it, regardless of your age. It doesn't just stop at the married to so-and-so moment, there will be times after the wedding and all when conflict arise and you have to be mature enough to deal with that.

2 comments:

Kehoe Cheong said...

What a great opinion,definitely a concrete sayings to those youngsters who want to get married so badly!

Seriously,I'm so fucked up those kids who take marriage as light as inhaling a ciggie.What a joke.I never look at them seriously,I laughed at them,instead.

Nej Jalidar said...

Yeah. And these dramas and stuffs portraying young rich couples and all are a bit ridiculous.

First of all, it's not real, secondly, why the hell are they giving young people wrong ideas of marriage? Even my mom laughed at the foolishness =___=